Thinking About Career Change

Right now our economy is probably at its lowest point since the Great Depression. Companies are laying off their employees in large numbers and no one's job appears to be safe. Many have found themselves either without a job or are facing the possibility of losing the one that they have. To those of you who find yourself in this position, here is a list of industries that are currently expanding despite the bad economy.

• Automotive - With everyone less willing to buy cars, more and more people are turning towards their local mechanic. Have you seen an engine? Do you own a ratchet and duct tape? Congratulations. You are qualified to work on cars. You can even create return business by loosening bolts.
  
• Maritime - Good pay, excellent benefits, you get to see the world, and you can get all the butt sex you could ever want.
• Military - Good pay, excellent benefits, you get to see the world, but you might die. Your spouse of two months will be glad that you bought the life insurance.
  
• Medical - More than likely, you aren't qualified to enter the medical field, and by the time you are qualified you'll be up to your nipples in debt and the economy may have turned around by then. Better not risk it.
• Robbery/Burglary - Don't have something? Take it. It's that simple. The job does have hazards, however, including, but not limited to, jail and a bullet to the face.
• Pimping - While prostitution is possible for the vagina-challenged, it is better for a man to get involved in the pimping side of the sex industry. Now, pimpin' ain't easy. In order to be a successful pimp you must possess a certain amount of charisma, confidence, and the ability to "lay down the pimp hand" whenever necessary. The rewards are plentiful, however: pink Cadillacs and furs abound for the successful pimp.
• Prostitution - The porn industry is seeking a bailout, but the underground sex trade is alive and well. Do you have a vagina? Just get out your shortest skirt, highest heels, and a bikini top and you are now in business for yourself.

This is perhaps the single best list of growing industries, but be creative and think of other places where you might excel. I hope you learned something today.